Ghost of Esmeralda

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Posts by Ghost of Esmeralda

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  33

  Do You Struggle With Depression???

  by minimus in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i know more persons that are depressed than i know that are not.

  whether a person was a witness or not, so many are affected with depression.

  i've read here that many jw's were on either regular medication or silently accepted their depression with much prayer and tears.

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  Ghost of Esmeralda

  Clinical depression and the various types of bipolar depression are very treatable medical illnesses, it is a matter of taking medication and getting the proper counseling. To illustrate it, it would be like asking if someone's diabetes appeared because the became a JW or disappeared because they stopped being a JW.

  THANK YOU for that, Blondie! So many people don't understand that.

  As a whole, I think JW's are the most depressed and depressing people on Earth. But I would be depressed with or without having ever been one, it's hereditary in my case.

  Which stinks because I can do all this work and leave the Borg and get a wonderful life and still battle the depression! UGH!

  Course, having a neurological disease doesn't help either. Hard to know where the clinical depression ends and the brain issues caused by my other disease begin.

  But Blondie is right. If you have clinical depression then it needs to be treated just like the diabetic needs insulin. I hope someday the stigma that goes with these medications, when they are truly needed, will be gone.

  ~essie
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  Webspace for my essays

  by Ghost of Esmeralda in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  due to another price hike at homestead i won't be renewing my webspace this year.

  it will expire at the beginning of july.. if anyone has webspace where they wouldn't mind hosting some of my essays, please e mail me at [email protected] and let me know.. otherwise, check them out while you can cause they'll be gone soon.. hugs.

  essie.

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  Ghost of Esmeralda

  thank you so much Lee! I will look into webspace there asap.

  Appreciate the info so much, you're a gem!

  love

  essie
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  3

  Webspace for my essays

  by Ghost of Esmeralda in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  due to another price hike at homestead i won't be renewing my webspace this year.

  it will expire at the beginning of july.. if anyone has webspace where they wouldn't mind hosting some of my essays, please e mail me at [email protected] and let me know.. otherwise, check them out while you can cause they'll be gone soon.. hugs.

  essie.

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  Ghost of Esmeralda

  Hi everyone,

  Due to another price hike at Homestead I won't be renewing my webspace this year. It will expire at the beginning of July.

  If anyone has webspace where they wouldn't mind hosting some of my essays, please e mail me at [email protected] and let me know.

  Otherwise, check them out while you can cause they'll be gone soon.

  hugs

  essie

  www.ghostwriter.homestead.com
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  37

  New here...(my story and a request for help)

  by stephaniesays in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  i was raised in the organization.

  my stepfather was a ministerial servant but was removed when i was 14, due to family problems, which he blamed on me (he was abusive, physically, and was told that if he cannot control his family, he could not be an example to the congregation).

  i became pregnant at 15 and have not really lived around my family since then.

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  Ghost of Esmeralda

  It sounds like you have a wonderful foundation for your life 'outside', your husband, your children. Don't let the person studying with you jeopardize all that! Just read, read, and read some more...I recommend www.silentlambs.org and www.freeminds.org . If the info on those sites doesn't convince you once and for all that these people cannot possibly be of any god you'd want to worship...than nothing can.

  Welcome aboard...

  essie

  www.ghostwriter.homestead.com
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  67

  Mulan could use some hugs.

  by Princess in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i don't think she has posted this yet.

  mulan called me yesterday afternoon to tell me her dad had suffered a stroke.

  i did talk to my dad last night and he seemed to think that grandpa was going to be ok. i had a birthday party with nine little girls all afternoon and was completely out of touch as a result.. i think she could use a hug, don't you?.

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  Ghost of Esmeralda

  ((((((((((Mulan)))))))))))))

  My heart is with you, my friend...

  love

  essie
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  4

  wondering who their friends are here (pun on words)

  by Jayson in

  1. social
  2. current

  http://www.meadmaker.com/joke/up/friends.html simple friends and real friends

  a simple friend can stand by you when you are right, but a real friend will stand by you even when you are wrong.

  a simple friend identifies himself when he calls.

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  Ghost of Esmeralda

  The timing on this thread couldn't have come at a better, more appropriate moment for me.

  Thanks, Jayson and Stinkypantz...

  ~essie

  www.ghostwriter.homestead.com
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  29

  Lost my job cause of the dubs!

  by kelpie in

  1. jw
  2. experiences

  these last two weeks have been just plain awful for me... 2 weeks i hope to never have to go through.

  firstly my mum disowns me, then i lose my baby and get an infection from the miscarriage.

  i go back to work after having 10 days off to find out i have lost my job.

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  Ghost of Esmeralda

  Oh, Kim. You have had a horrible time of it lately... I'm so sorry! Your mom had no right to call you at work about personal issues...neither did the elders! That makes me so furious.

  You should talk to your employer. I would send notice to the elders that if they contact you at work again you will seek legal recourse. Tell your employer that you are being harassed and are seeking to stop it, there is no way they should be able to fire you for that!

  I'm probably not making much sense this morning, I'm pretty out of it today but I just had to post and tell you I've been thinking about you ever since you lost your baby...and will keep sending love and healing thoughts your way...

  hugs,

  essie

  www.ghostwriter.homestead.com
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  25

  first timer...feelin like crap

  by Boolean in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  hey everyone....this this my first time on one of these forums... been out for short while, but i miss my family and the friends i grew up with.. feeling a little shitty.

  how did u cope with suddenly being cut off from the people that you love and depend on?.

  by the way, if your wondering about my nik, look it up, thats how my mind is right now.

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  Ghost of Esmeralda

  Hey there boolean, welcome to the never-ending circus that is the life of an exJW with relatives still in the Borg! I hope you find some comfort here among those in similiar circumstances.

  Wish I had some wonderfully healing advice to offer. All I can do is recommend a couple books, and websites. Read as much as you can at Freeminds and Silentlambs if you ever waver wondering whether the decision to leave was right.

  Read this board often to know that you're not alone and so many of us have lost everything by leaving, except the most important thing, ourselves.

  Sometimes, you will feel like you've lost yourself, too. But you have to give it time. You'll find you're still in there, and that you like yourself a lot better for having had the sense to finally say enough, and get out.

  For reading, I recommend The Four Agreements by Don Miguel Ruiz (changed forever the way I look at my fellow humans) Life Strategies by Dr. Phil McGraw. I've just started reading a book by Byron Katie called "Loving what it is" and it looks good but I can't give it a full review yet cause I haven't gotten that far into it, but it was recommended to me by a venerable poster here :)

  Wish you the best of luck. Hope this makes sense as the caffeine hasn't kicked in yet this morning.

  Welcome to the real world...enjoy your stay! :)

  hugs

  essie

  www.ghostwriter.homestead.com
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  48

  Another Df'ing/suicide...in memory of a dear friend...

  by Ghost of Esmeralda in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  things have calmed down again with my mother to the point where i found myself once again in her kitchen last night.

  drinking too many cups of coffee as i always do at her house, i imagine if i were a smoker i'd have been lighting one cigarette after another instead.

  it had been a pleasant enough evening, i sat there with my crocheting in my lap, something i always take with me to my mother's house so that if i get nervous or stressed out, my hands, and my mind, have something to do and somewhere to go.

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  Ghost of Esmeralda

  Hi Coffee,

  just discovered your reply to this thread, thank you for writing.

  Unfortunately I could put two chapters in that book, three if you count my own struggle with suicidal tendencies since the age of 12. But I think you're right, if there was a way to remember, and put these stories in one place, it SHOULD be done.

  I have webspace...if anyone has essays that they want to put up in a In Memory of those lost to suicide section, e mail me at [email protected] and I will do my best to get them up onto the web.

  I am going to add Drew's story to my website right now.

  As a footnote; I never found an obituary for Drew, but through a friend of my mom's I was able to get the last known address for his wife, and I did write a letter to her, and her son. I don't know if she'd even read the whole thing, knowing that I'm out of the Org...but I had to try.

  thanks again everyone for your posts to this thread. I'm still looking back at them and reading them.

  love

  essie
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  58

  New member

  by Winston Smith :>D in

  1. jw
  2. friends

  i just wanted to say hi to the group here.. been baptized for 15 years now.

  my wife has been baptized for a little less than that time period.. been an aux poi., reg pio, ms. wife is a reg pio currently.

  now im just a lowly publisher :d. have had many doubts over the years on small matters.

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  Ghost of Esmeralda

  Hi Winston, welcome to the board...

  when I saw your username I jumped...an old friend of mine who has since passed used to go by Winston on the old H2O board. Will take me a little while to get used to seeing it again!

  Things will be, er, interesting if your wife is still a pioneer...but I wish you only the best as you embark on this journey, my good man. Godspeed!

  essie

  www.ghostwriter.homestead.com